On Marriage

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Grace has taught me two important principles in marriage, submission and being a help-meet.

First is about submission: With 33 years of marriage, grace has taught me the meaning of the word “Submission”. Submission without the grace of God is like quantum physics to a 3 year old. It so hard to submit especially if you know you can also make it in the career world. It is like going against the current of a rampaging river. But it is the grace of God that shapes the heart to submit and cling to what is commanded. By submitting, and therefore by obeying, the heart becomes still and at peace. The grace of submission quiets the heart from the rumbling sound of rebellion and the so called “self-actualization.”

Submission is to strive hard to make the best of the wife’s calling. To care for the children, and the husband, and the home in the best way you possibly can, and to improve on these little by little. It is to make the home a happy place, where they would always love to come home to.

Submission is to be thankful for the sacrifices of the husband to provide for his family. It is to recognize that the husband as the provider, works hard in his job, and should be freed from other concerns that pertains to the home and other nitty gritty, like the income tax, payment of bills and so on.

Submission is to highly respect, regard, and admire the husband; and to see him as the best man in the whole wide world. It is to think that the husband is wise enough when he makes the final say. But it is also to recognize that the husband can commit mistakes, having his own set of human weakness. But the wife who lovingly submits can gain the husband’s confidence which allows her to rebuke, make comments and suggestions, and knows she will be heard.

The wife as a helpmeet is like the wings in a winged seed. She clings to the seed in its rising and falling, until it is planted in its appointed place in the sun. There, the seed will grow and bear fruits. And the wing is happy to be “wings”, and along with the seed grows into a fruitful tree. The “wings” -to perform its duty – must be closely entwined or perfectly fitted to the seed. This close relationship must be worked out in marriage because it does not come naturally. Communication is very important. It is the glue that seals the gaps, and repairs the leaks and patches holes in a relationship.

In my dealing with my husband, I am guided by Proverbs 31:12 : “She does him good and not evil all the days of his life”. And so it is always my prayer, that I will be a blessing and a joy to my husband.

God has a perfect design for marriage. As submission becomes fully ripen, it will bring fruits of joy and liberation. Joy because she knows she is in the circle of God’s will; and liberation, because she will be freed from the piercing arrows of pains and sorrows brought about by an unsubmissive spirit. God is unimaginably good. Let God be praised for everything. On Marriage .hdlasco. GBC-LB Couples’ Night. UPLB Guest House, March 23, 2013  

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